REBUILD YOUR TRUST AFTER A BREAKUP
Trust is one of the key factor for a stable and successful relationship.
Whenever you are presented a change, doubt and fears are normal. When you have been upset, disappointed, and hurt, you may wonder if you chose the right person. Again, it all depends how you navigate through those fears. Or else you can sabotage it and can push the other person away.
Take for example, race car drivers get into accidents and get injured all the time. But that does not stop them from coming back on the racetrack. Why? Because they are passionate about it and they commit themselves to the sport. Let us talk about the author of Harry Potter, J.K Rowling. We all know how many times her manuscript was rejected before she got her famous break. Did she give up? NOPE.
It is a commitment to oneself first. You will not have one foot out the door then. If you commit to yourself and make your love and relationship a priority, you will not give up on every little upset. You need to pedal the cycle to ride it. It won’t ride by itself. Or else you will fall. Learning to trust yourself and your own feelings and reassuring yourself that you will be okay moving forward is the key to any healthy relationship.
I have talked to many women who blame men overall. These women unfortunately had bad experiences does not mean all men are bad. We bring our past experiences into present and ruin the chances of enjoying the current person we are with.
The good news is, trust can be rebuilt if both of you are committed to the relationship. All you need to do is give them, and yourself, a chance. It is a process. And it needs work, patience, and time. One step at a time. Trust is built over lot of conversations, little moments, small gestures, always keeping each other’s benefit in mind.
Here are some helpful tips to rebuild trust:
“As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live” — Fahkry
Be willing to give as well as receive. Usually one person gives more than the other. It works if each person is comfortable and doesn’t feel neglected. It is not a business transaction that you keep a track who is giving more. And this balance of “give and take” keeps shifting from one partner to another depending on different situations. One partner takes on the role of a giver when required such as sickness. Don’t deny your partner to give you, especially if you are mostly a giver. Be willing to receive and let both the processes happen. There is nothing wrong in taking some help.
Stop pursuing perfection. But at the same time keep your non-negotiables (deal breakers) in mind.
Trust is fragile. There is an expression I read somewhere that says, “trust arrives on foot and leaves on horseback.” However, you are in control of your own actions, so make sure that you do your best because dwelling on any negative emotion for that matter won’t help you or your current/future relationship.
Please don’t hesitate to get in touch with me for one on one advice if you are not sure.
Originally published at https://www.lovelifecoachxo.com on October 21, 2020.
